Tag Archives: tech

Scooby-Doo Mystery Machine uses Flintstones tech.

scooby doo mystery machine uses flintstones tech

Revealed at last! A crazy cartoon conspiracy! That groovy Mystery Machine used by the Scooby-Doo ghostbusting gang was borrowed from Fred Flintstone!

The conclusive proof can be seen in the above photo!

This is actually good news for those assorted villains and malcontents who pose as wacky monsters and ghosts. The Mystery Machine’s prehistoric bipedal technology would be inadequate to capture even lovable Dino. Unless, perhaps, it were powered by Scooby snacks.

Amazing biotech miracle: How to grow a new penis!

You might grow two penises.
You might grow two penises.

Recently a human ear was grown on the stomach of a rat using stem cell technology.

Experimental biology has produced many amazing breakthroughs, including the ability to grow complete human organs. In the future, once medical technology reaches a certain level of advancement, humans might never die. Humans might become immortal. When an organ fails, it will be replaced.

This includes the penis.

Just think. Thanks to the advancement of scientific knowledge, when your limp old dick finally wears out (and it will), one day your doctor might be able to order a brand new one.

Like a forever-youthful god, you and your manly appendage will become immortal.

While it’s impossible to know the future precisely, each new penis that you acquire will probably be grown on a lobotomized clone, in a vat of liquid protein, or on a pig.

Genetic techniques might also be developed, greatly altering humans. Like a lizard regrowing its tail, your future self might be able to regrow a new penis. That is, after your useless old schlong is cut off.

It’s actually even possible that you might grow a second or third penis.

You might grow a second penis on your chin, for example. And then you might grow a third penis on your foot.

The future will be full of astonishing miracles!

Sign up to colonize Mars.

Make this your new home.
Make this your new home.

Okay wannabe astronauts, now that I have your attention… I actually haven’t figured out where you can sign up for a Mars mission. Sorry. But I DO know where you can prepare yourself mentally: at the Marspedia!

Learn everything you’ll need to know about your future journey to and colonization of the red planet!

Be bold! Go where no one has gone before! Prepare yourself for the ultimate adventure! And you better be very very well-prepared, because to save money and resources, chances are you won’t be returning to Earth!

Spend the remainder of your life on a barren red rock! Melt water ice! Smelt rocks! Avoid dust storms! Eat algae! Oh, boy! Where can I sign up?

How to get your own personal robot!

Some nice used robots for sale.
Some nice used robots for sale.

Don’t deny it. You love robots. They’re cool. So why not get yourself a cool robot? They seem to be everywhere these days! Some are practical, some are just plain goofy, but all are fascinating to play around with. Here’s a great web page that catalogs most of the robots that are available on Amazon.com. It’s fun just to check it out. You can even build your own robot if you’re inclined!

Sign up for space travel to the moon.

Checking out the scenery.
This could be you.

Tired of going on cruises? Have you been on one too many road trips? Have you outgrown amusement parks? Then sign up today to be the first private citizen to walk on the moon. This website provides details.

If a journey to the moon is a bit too ambitious, you can also sign up for a short suborbital trip above our beautiful blue planet! And it’s surprisingly affordable!

A bunch of super cool things on Google Earth.

Island love.
Island love.

Perhaps you won’t see yourself on Google Earth, but you might see your car illegally double parked on the street or your neighbor sunbathing naked! Better yet, you might see any number of the weird and super-interesting things linked on this fascinating website.

Perhaps Google should be called goggle, or ogle. Who knew such bizarre stuff could be found on this planet we fondly call the big blue marble?