Tag Archives: animals

Rude giraffe sticks tongue out at my aunt.

Rude giraffe sticks tongue out at my horrified Aunt Bessie.
Rude giraffe sticks tongue out at my horrified Aunt Bessie.

Thank goodness for the invention of cell phones. Now everybody can capture life’s precious moments with a quick flick of the finger.

My Aunt Bessie was scandalized when an otherwise polite giraffe stuck its long tongue out with sincere derision. The beast craned its neck for a really good look at my horrified relative. Then out came its mocking blue tongue.

I’ve been tempted to do something similar. But, alas, I’m a more civilized creature. All I can do is frame the wonderful photo and place it on the desk in my cubicle.

Sharks have real feelings, including sadness.

Absolutely Bizarre Humor

This shark is feeling very sad at the moment. That's quite obvious. This shark is feeling very sad at the moment. That’s quite obvious.

I have absolute photographic proof that certain ravenous, cold-blooded eating machines are in fact very sensitive creatures. You might want to give this sad shark a great big loving hug. I’m sure you’ll be touched.

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Climate change: Polar bears on a tropical island.

Polar bears observed on a tropical island under palm trees.
Polar bears observed on a tropical island near palm trees.

The pace of global climate change is truly alarming. Polar bears, left to fend for themselves without ice floes in the Arctic, have now been spotted as far south as Hawaii. These two polar bears, photographed near swaying palm trees, were forced by rapidly warming temperatures to migrate far across the Pacific Ocean in search of a solid place to stand. Hopefully their new tropical island home isn’t soon underwater.

Small cute kitten gets one trillion Facebook likes.

Small cute kitten gets one trillion Facebook likes.
Small cute kitten gets one trillion Facebook likes.

This small cute kitten named Meow is the recipient of one trillion likes on Facebook. Surprisingly, Meow’s Facebook celebrity status now surpasses that of Rover, Ruff, Tigger, Kitty, Dog, Fuzzball and Lady Gaga.

Dog runs for mayor of enlightened California city.

Dog runs for mayor of enlightened California city.
Dog runs for mayor of enlightened California city.

A dog named Bones is running for mayor of an enlightened California city. The candidate has posted banners around town and has appeared on television and radio for several groundbreaking interviews. You might find this recent interview by a well-known reporter especially interesting:

Reporter: Thank you again for taking the time to answer a few questions. Why have you chosen to run for mayor of Coronado?

Bones: Woof. Woof.

Reporter: I see. Was this a very difficult decision for you to make? Has your family supported you?

Bones: Woof. Woof. Woof.

Reporter: Should you become the next mayor of Coronado, what exactly will be your agenda?

Bones: Woof.

Reporter: Thank you so very much.

Tourists attacked by leaping killer whale.

Killer whale one second before devouring eight tourists.
Killer whale one second before devouring eight tourists.

A killer whale was photographed the very moment it leapt from the sparkling blue bay, attacking and devouring eight tourists who were out for a leisurely stroll. This photo was taken one second before the innocent tourists succumbed to their fishy fate.

The crumpled clothes of earlier victims are visible nearby on the grass. Avoid this waterfront park at all costs.

Children to visit a weird, bizarre petting zoo.

Future petting zoos to include Dodo birds and Jackalopes.

Thanks to recent amazing breakthroughs in genetic science, cloning, and advanced biological technology, it’s now considered probable that future petting zoos will include both the extinct Dodo bird and the legendary (and fictional) high plains Jackalope.

Whether DNA is used to reproduce long-extinct animals, or to create bizarre combinations of very different species, biotech promises to provide humanity with an enormous, limitless source of future amusement. Young children visiting petting zoos will encounter the whimsical and bizarre creatures once relegated to fantasy storybooks.

Imagine cuddling a cute, furry Jackalope (while carefully avoiding the horns), or laughing at the silly-looking Dodo.

Humankind’s endlessly amusing future will feature a mind-boggling variety of freakish wonders!

Goats that can (almost) talk.

This goat probably has lots to say.
This goat probably has lots to say.

Lots of people sound like goats. But have you heard of amazing, talented goats that sound like people? Take a listen!

That one goat who’s especially talkative sounds a bit like one prominent politician, whose name I won’t mention. I’m sure you can guess exactly who.

That other goat sounds remarkably like my nosy next door neighbor.

I’m 97 percent sure my neighbor doesn’t read this blog. He doesn’t read much of anything. But he sure does talk a lot. He hangs his scrawny neck over my fence and rapidly moves his jaws. Kinda like a goat. But I believe an ordinary goat is more literate.

Just kidding.

A real living monster Headless Chicken!

Mike The Headless Chicken
Mike The Headless Chicken

Could a chicken without a head really survive for 18 months? Mike the Headless Chicken did! And by doing so, Mike became one of the most famous and acclaimed chickens in chicken history.

Mike the Headless Chicken might not have been technically headless, but he does remind me of various monsters. Take, for example, Hogwarts ghost Nearly Headless Nick. Same grisly concept. Cool!