How to appear smart because seeming intelligent is very important.

This guy doesn't look so smart.
This guy doesn’t look so smart.

It’s critical in these enlightened times to appear intelligent. Impressing your fellow human beings is really, truly, incredibly important. By appearing intelligent, people will respect you. They will regard you with awe. And you will feel confident and superior. Which feels good! Everyone knows that nothing in life is more important than feeling good.

Making yourself seem intelligent is thankfully very easy. All you must do is stand erect (posture is tremendously important) and face your peers with a confident, knowing smile and recite the following lines:

Pogo Lord And The Toilet Muff

Relevant Bucket

Failed Rotund Twilight Crescendo

External Of His Willy Absorbed

Arcane Evermore

Stud Articles For Crabby League

Incoherent Student Nibbles Raspberries

Moonshine Reward

Nose Down Searching The Quartered Psychosis

Before Happy Ivory Comes The Belly

Soap For Burrowing Mildew

Lamentable Sheep

Grenade Swallow

Vegetarian Log And The Orderly Steamship

Obscenely Convincing Fiction Of The Loop

Feast Of Euphoria

Loopy Eyes Digesting Every Skyscraper

Wizard Of Scarred

Until Strategy Of The Intangible Mayhem

Tonic Of Spherical Worm Munchers

Proverbial Flesh Stabbing Practice

Blessed Carnal Under Worthless Air

Nocturnal Flaw

Poser Of A Drunken High Gutter

Precisely Astounding Company Misfortune

Hot Terror Escaping Lava

Regular Eskimo

Scream Before Intelligent Optimism

Mild Pole Erectile Nuisance

Afterglow Revolver And Grizzly Chronicle

Riddle Of Weeping Revolving Toads

Flamboyant Foolish Sauce

Messenger Fox Duping Italian

Fearless Mildew

Archetype Management Of The Slipping Style

Elephant Of Wickedness

Colliding Blue Fanny

Moonshine Pranks Determined Ghostly

Astute Erotica

Septic Maniac

Deadly Driven Your Untrue Tendon

Cretin Plumber

Barbed Philosopher And The Armored Broadcast

Busted Chemistry Kicking Constrictors

Lower Bonus From One Flapjack Longevity

Defective Kite

Underneath Paranoid Fortified Voltage

Misplaced Insight Polyester Pattern

Glowing Neon Except Creation

Whispering Banshee

Pure Neglect For Twelfth Purveyor Of Branch Imitation

Stinging Footstep And The Fallen Geek

Wednesday Flop

Mexican Stroke Flaming Red Herb

Intelligent Cider Monosyllabic Bath

Holy Sailor Fallen Elephant

Pragmatic Mars And The Brilliant Dump

Locomotive Of The Manual Hiccup

Freezer Explosion

Severe Nutmeg Faith

Vegetable Transit

Quivering Iris

Blushing Swinger Hopeless Possessed

Cheerful Reptile A Florida Whack

Genetic Ammunition

Bane Of The Northern Didactic Magnet

Skid Of The Contemplated Smash

Troubled Trio And The Robotic Majesty

Drool Of The Adrenalin

Dreamy Verbs From Spilt Conception

Sliding Beat Across Kinetic Loop

Damned Invincible Not Eloquent

Solid Novice And The Rasping Carbuncle

Puffy Stench

Give it a try! Everyone you meet will immediately see that you are overflowing with unsurpassed profundity. Everyone will be highly impressed!